Tag Archive: mothers

Christine Lagarde

Christine Lagarde. Photo by Forbes Magazine

When asked by PBS talk radio, what made you so successful, Christine Lagarde, the first women Managing director, International Monetary Fund, she replied “My parent’s love and encouragement” made me what I am.  She was ranked #8 as the Most Powerful Women in the World by Forbes Magazine. She lives in Washington, D.C., and is helping over 180 countries finance their economies.  She has been asked if she would run for President of France.  Her success is outlined by Wikipedia. Yes, Love is the Greatest Gift.


Hoorah! Bay Clinic Promotes Parenting and Sex Abstinence

Thank you to Bay Clinic for sharing their radio commercials that encourages increased parent and child engagement and urges parents to talk to their adolescent children about sex and family planning.  Sex education is not a one time talk, instead a series of talks beginning from the age of one.  Their commercials tie into Starts at Home article article about teaching sex education before the age of seven.

Bay Clinic is using  three (3) commercials to promote their message and services.  We like hearing the word abstinence on the radio and hope it touches the lives of parents and children; it was so refreshing to hear these commercials produce and aired in 2011, enjoy these important messages.

Commercial #1  – Bay Clinic_Teen Pregnancy-2-Men

Commercial #2 – Bay Clinic_Teen Pregnancy-Father & Son

Commercial #3 – Bay Clinic_Teen Pregnancy-Mom & Daughter

Bay Clinic does not provide abortions but they will offer pregnant women neutral and factual information, non-directive counseling, and referrals upon request for our women patients’ pregnancy options.

Starts at Home encourages other parenting organizations to promote abstinence at an early age and to join in to help parents train children in the way they should go.  A wise parenting choice is to start teaching sex education as part of early childhood development; a popular article in Starts at Home is  Teaching Sex Education Starts at Home – Toddlers, Children, Four Steps Before Seven Years Old.

Thank you Bay Clinic for your concerns and creative public service announcement.

Precious time with Dad

To find happiness Walt Disney said,  “A man should never neglect his family for business.”  Oil Tycoon J. Paul Getty said “I hate to be a failure. I hate and regret the failure of my marriages. I would gladly give all my millions for just one lasting marital success.”  And, U.S. President Bill Clinton said “The single biggest social problem in our society may be the growing absence of fathers from their homes and children.”

In an article found in the website of  the U.S. Department of  Health and Human Services, Office of Population Affairs, we are reminded and too familiar with the statistics of being raised in a fatherless homes; at JSI Research and Training Institute’s conference,  moderated by, Gilbert Chavez, 06-10-09, he reminds us that fatherless homes are:

  • 5 times more likely to commit crimes,
  • 9 times more likely to drop out of school
  • 20 times more likely to end up in prison
  • Forty percent of all children born in America today will be born to unmarried parents.

This article focuses on how we as fathers can be a #Gooddad to strengthen our relationship with our children and spouse.

First and importantly a family starts at home with a good husband or father who loves God and sacrifices time and resources for their spouse and children.  This is a cornerstone and foundation of a good family. It’s not about how much money we make or how active and recognized we are in the community, instead it’s about the quality time spent with our children and how we lovingly encourage, teach, discipline, and empower our children.

Here are some Ideas for Husbands, #Gooddads, and Parents.

  1. Come to agreement that you place your wife/spouse and children as the most important part in your life.  The material things in life – although very important – will be taken care of even when we often just don’t see how it will all work out.  Dining out, a new television, computer, car, a second car, another promotion at work, a boat, social clubs, an airplane, etc…  are not as important as a healthy close knit family and it’s not the “bling” at the end that makes you sing.
  2. We make sacrifices for our spouses and children, we give up on “my turn”  for them, “my turn” will eventually come up again. Remember what J.P. Getty mentioned? … he regretted ALL his failed marriages and would give up ALL his money for one successful marriage, all his riches did not bring him peace and happiness, he could not buy what he cherished.  Work six days a week and try not to work seven days, instead, have a guiltless day off… one day off will rejuvenate yourself and others around you.
  3. We will not judge our spouse and will accept them as they are, differences and all. Not accepting their differences and arguing with them while having or hiding your own faults may lead to the break up a marriage and family.
  4. Hug your spouse and children daily, they love and need to hear .. “I Love You”; you may share a small gift, or leave a small note. Those three simple words are magic when they come from your heart. Your agape love heals, rejuvenates, builds a family, and strengthens humanity.
  5. Dads, when children come into your life, make changes in your routine to be with them, and to help your wife raise them. You can include the children in your events, so that they don’t feel rejected.  It’s important that you help with the feeding late of nights, change the diapers, take the children to the doctor, read to the children, play with them, discipline and don’t enable them and spoil them, take them to the sports or hobbies they enjoy, go to the parent student conferences, attend their practices, go camping, travel together, and those fun things in life.  The children want and need you in their lives and they will follow you, or they may run away from the home.
  6. Help around the house with chores, especially when both parents work.  Teach the children to have their share of the chores; surprisingly the work gets done and there’s more time for other activities.
  7. Teaching takes time and patience, and when the children learn they become productive members of the family and the home runs more smoothly. Teach them chores, show them good values, help with their school’s homework.  It was gratifying to see in Honolulu Magazine’s May 2010, Mililani School had the highest ranking of over 250 schools in Hawaii, and not surprisingly parent participation they ranked the best in Hawaii and the school did extremely well national quantifiable test scores; this was contrary to the school with the lowest parenting rating and was ranked the worst of the schools  in Hawaii.
  8. Know that each of your children are different, encourage them in their own interests and watch them grow, help them find their way in life and let them live their lives, as parents we are there to encourage them and pick them up when they fall. They will find their way when we let them fall, cry; then hug them, and say,”It will be fine and you’ll get that right on your next try”.
  9. Along life’s path, suffering will occur, you’re not alone, when our children see us suffering, they learn to get through the suffering too, we teach other not to give up.
  10. Take the children out for treat for a job well done, we like rewards that we earn.


Starts at Home was started at pot dinners at Carl and Amy’s home on the second Tuesday of the month, they featured a speaker and gave parents a chance to ask questions.  The gathering starts at 5:30 pm and ends before 8:00 pm. If you’re in Hilo, Hawaii, you were welcome to come.

Parents Nurturing and Loving Children

Here’s a subject many parents shy away from due to not being sure how to communicate with their children on this sensitive and important subject.  Parents Inc. and our moderators will be sharing with our parenting group ways to communicate to children on this subject. Guest speakes from Parent’s Inc. will include *Regina Puritan, Big Island Director, and *Danielle Stain, Clinical Supervisor.

The important points in this class is sharing material that is age appropriate presented in a nurturing way.  The class will share ways to build a bond between child and parent(s) so children will openly seek the parent’s knowledge instead of going to other children or inappropriate media.  We hope you will join our fun group.  Anyone parenting is invited, especially dads.

Moderators(s):                           Carl Okuyama and Leonard Mukai, Ph.D.

Date:                                         Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Time:                                        5:30 pm to 8:30 pm

Cost:                                         Pot Luck Dinner,  No Fees

Sitter:                                      Amy Okuyama (librarian) will help sit the children. If you would like to help sit the children, your assistance would be appreciated.

Place:                                       Carl and Amy’s Place, 1346 Kilikina Street, Hilo, located above Hilo Medical Center; take second left street passed Hilo Medical center – Lahi Street; then take first right – Kilikina Street; then drive down the hill .4 mile to 1346 Kilikina; on the left side; two-story grey and white colored house.

RSVP:  startsathome@hotmail.com,   or call Carl at (808) 937-4392, or Amy (808) 938-8977.

Starts at Home Map - 1346 Kilikina Street, Hilo, Hawaii 96720
Map to Starts at Home – 1346 Kilikina Street, Hilo, Hawaii 96720
Bio on Speakers:
*Regina Purinton,  Big Island Program Director Parents Inc. is originally from Oahu.  She obtained by Bachelor’s in Social Work and her Master’s in Social Work from the University of Hawaii at Manoa in 1994 when she relocated to Hilo.  Her past experience includes:  Working for the Department of Human Services as a Social Worker, in Hilo as well as on Oahu.  She also worked for DHS in the licensing of Day Care facilities and private homes. She has experience working for the Department of Health in the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Division. She helped open the Hilo office of PARENTS Inc in 1999 and has been the Program Director since.

*Danielle Spain, Clinical Supervisor has lived in Hilo since 1992. She obtained a double Bachelor’s degree in Sociology and Communication from UH Hilo as well as her certification in treating addiction. In 2002 she received her Master’s in Counseling from the University of Phoenix. She has a small private counseling practice working with juvenile sex offenders and she and her husband are foster parents for high risk youth. Her past experience includes: 10 years working in the field of addiction eventually becoming the Director of Operations for the Big Island Substance Abuse Council. She then went and worked for various non-profits here in Hilo gaining experience working with a number of social ills including poverty, domestic violence, sex assault and high risk youth. Most recently she worked for the Department of Human Services Child Welfare as an investigator. In July of 2010 PARENTS Inc was awarded the VCM contract and she came to work for PARENTS Inc.